What I'm doing instead of packing

Have you seen that show "Who Do You Think You Are?" on NBC? I am RIVETED. I love it. It's a sort of random assortment of celebrities, and each week one of them researches their family history. Whether I like the celebrity or not, the show itself is fascinating. I'm a geek. Whatever.

First the celebrity starts with their own family and gets a few names. Usually no farther back than a great-grandparent. Then they head off to whatever location they know for those names. They have the help of genealogists and historians. That's what I think makes the show so interesting. They incorporate historical reference (geek. I already said that.). It's one thing to look down a line of names, but it's so much more interesting when there's an expert who can explain what those things meant at the time. For example, Emmit Smith got a name of an ancestor, but the historian was able to tell him that her last name indicated that although she was a slave, she was the daughter of the slave trader.

One thing that's amazed me watching the show, is how few generations most people have been able to go back on their own. I come from a long line of genealogy nuts. So I've already got a lot of that information, and I'm really thankful for that. I already know that I could be a legit Daughter of the American Revolution twice over. I know I'm a descendant of Lucy Stone, the first woman in the United States to keep her surname after marriage and the woman credited with getting Susan B. Anthony involved in the women's movement. We have a diary of an ancestor from the civil war. I've got a binder of family tree information with people as far back as at least the 1600s (I can't verify because it's packed - good for me!).

The other thing that makes it fun to watch, is the celebrity gets to visit the places involved. Lisa Kudrow traveled to Belarus to see the place where her great-grandmother was killed by Nazis. I've always been kind of a history nerd, and you can see how much of an impact it has on them to visit the locations. It becomes less of a story and more real. There's something to walking the literal paths your ancestors walked.

It's definitely made me want to escape my real life of needing to work and pack, and dive into some sort of family history journey. I wonder if I'll still find it as interesting when I'm not supposed to be doing other things.

To everything, there is a season

Only right now, it feels like "In this season, is everything." I have muddled through the rougher parts of Trimester 1, and I'm no longer carrying plastic bags in my purse. A week from today we're closing on a house, and moving in the next day. My laptop died about a month ago, and I've been working on getting that fixed and getting my ultra-important bookkeeping file fixed. And you know what I've noticed about the nature of freelancing? I will not hear from 4 or 5 customers for a couple of months, and then they will all contact me in the same week. How does that even happen? In kid news, Natalie had another bladder infection and Ella is under allergy attack.

Also? I think I missed quite a few things that are going on. I'm sure there's more than that. Hence, I have been rather absent from Ye Olde Blog.

But I think some fun things have happened, too. Please enjoy (or just read) them in bullet form:
• I heard a heartbeat! It only lasted for 3 seconds, but it was there. Hooray!
• We're closing on our house next week! That means we're moving into our house. Hooray!
• The girls are moving on to the next level of swimming lessons. Which makes for a much more calm mommy in the pool area. Hooray!
• My ultra-important computer file has been recovered! Hooray!
• I had a yummy chocolate shake from the fancy McDonald's! This is a phenomenon I don't totally get. We have a regular McD's a couple miles from us. Fine. But then a couple miles farther is a fancy McD's. It's all marble-y and they carry several flavors of gelato. If I get a shake there, it comes in the frappuccino cup complete with whip and drizzled chocolate. Hooray! (Although the most important note here, is that neither McD's has the McRib. BOO.)
• It was in the 60s for almost a week! It was a truly delightful, springy week. Sunshine and warm weather. The neighborhood was crawling with people. We had to open our windows everyday because it was getting too hot in the house. Hooray! (I will not think about how it might snow tonight)
• I finally picked up our Wisconsin plates! Hooray! (Oddly, I noticed a tiny bottle of vodka that had been run over in the DMV parking lot. Is it a good idea to have a bump before taking your test?)

I should probably be absent from Ye Olde Blog next week as well, unless I manage to get an obscene amount of packing done this week. I'm also feeling challenged to take a week off of Facebook. But I doubt I'll feel that way come Monday. The bond is too strong...

A history of couches

I was checking out a post of Kelly's over at Love Well about her first couch, and realized after starting the world's longest comment that I may as well make it a blog post.

Our first couch
When we first got married, one of my husband's coworkers offered us a couch they had at their cabin. Free! We followed them up about an hour north to the cabin, and discovered the world's oldest couch. Literally a good 40 or 50 years old. We'd shown so much excitement over getting the couch. I don't think either of us wanted it once we saw it, but they'd gone so out of their way to help us out and we were grateful. So we loaded up the world's heaviest couch in their truck, and it nearly killed us to get it into our second floor apartment. It was the heaviest piece of furniture I'd ever seen, and scratchy. It wasn't particularly comfortable, but it was a couch. Beggars can't be choosers and all that. I covered it with some kind of makeshift slipcover, and it was ours for about a year. Then it was unceremoniously dumped on the curb when we moved out, nearly killing a few people again to get it out of the building.

The second couch
Our second couch came from a newspaper ad that I swiped at work before it ran. It was a rather beaten up couch/loveseat set, but it was really comfortable. It was covered in marker stains, but we didn't really care. When we brought it into our new apartment, we knocked out a light fixture. It was clear the couch wasn't going to make it through, so my dad hopped up on the end of the couch and just yanked that light right out of the ceiling.

When it was time to move that couch out to make room for a new hand-me-down living room set, we couldn't bear to try and get it through the door again. So my brother-in-law and his dad came over, and rigged up some kind of rope & pulley action. We took it out over the balcony. Of our third floor apartment. Probably giving a few of our elderly neighbors quite a scare.

Third couch
That's when we got a living room set from Captain America's godparents. They were moving to another state, so we drove a couple hours to the Twin Cities to liberate the furniture. We scored a couch, coffee table, two wing back chairs and lamps. They'd seen better days, but now we had a grown up living room SET! Matching furniture! And after many years of marriage and three couches, I think we'd spent a total of $75 on furniture. Win!

Today
Now we have a real couch. A couple of years ago we went to Slumberland and paid real money for one. Soon we will move into our new house (hey! I should pack!), and we will have a living room AND family room. So we'll be on the lookout again. For a kind coworker. A family member or friend with extra. Newspaper ads. Craigslist. Who knows.

Excuses, excuses.

Oh, Bloggy Friends. I've been such a slacker. But I promise I have a good reason. I haven't been posting because the only thing I wanted to post about wasn't yet postable.

themommylogues is about to get mommier. I'm due September 25. Ages from now.

So we're just kind of seeing how many major life changes we can fit into a year. New town, new state, new job, new schools, new church, new house, new baby. I'm keeping the husband, though.

For the next 7 months, you can expect me to bore you to death with details of cravings, virtual narcolepsy, and my too-big-already stomach.

Speaking of cravings - holy cats! I just have to hear a food mentioned in passing and I want some. I was just listening to a Dave Matthews Band song with the line "you ain't never had my cornbread" and I was all "Hey, CORNBREAD!" Also, just like with the other two pregnancies, I'm dying for some baked potatoes. Preferably from Red Lobster (hello, salt-crusted-goodness, I'll take two please). I'd told myself I was going to be better about eating habits this time, but once you're making your way toward the other side of morning sickness it's just such a thrill to want food again. The cravings move faster than they can be satisfied. A few minutes ago I was all for a chocolate shake (and some cornbread) and now I'm thinking about a good turkey sandwich from my sister's Thanksgiving turkey. With mustard. Oooh! Shiny!

Anyway. That is all.

Visions of Sugar Plums

I tend to look at things a little idealistically, I think. And reality never quite matches up.

Case in point: Days off of school.

The girls have been out of school now for, oh, four hours or so. They don't go back again until next Wednesday.

Sugar Plums
What a precious time this will be. It will be so nice to have Ella home, since it seems like she's gone all the time. They'll play together and have special sister bonding time. Maybe we'll find some fun things to do. What a nice break this will be.

Reality
They have already destroyed the house. I have stepped into no less than four yelling matches. The kitchen floor is covered in construction paper, crayons, glue sticks and tape.

This I know for sure: we are going out for dinner.

The lost has been partially found.

Ella is a free spirit.

A couple of weeks ago she lost her library books from school. At school. They never even made it into her backpack. Two of them got returned by someone else, and I found the last one this morning when I stopped in to deliver the class party Valentine cookies. It was on the shelf by the lockers, but nowhere near her own locker.

I'd gone in to drop off said cookies, and try to track down her lunchbox. Ella recently decided she likes getting hot lunch, even though she eats PB&J almost every day instead of getting the intended lunch. But yesterday she didn't want to consider it so she had me pack her a lunch. Which she never ate and forgot somewhere at school. I did find it, down on the other end from the library book. I think it got pretty kicked around, but hey, her lunch from yesterday was still there.

Still missing: her warmest hat and her mittens. Lost on separate occasions.

In other news, I'm starting to keep an eye out for Stacy & Clinton. I know what I'm supposed to be doing. But lately in the morning it's all I can do to get the kids out the door. I hate to admit that today I went inside Ella's school AND to Target (where I scored some major deals) before I'd managed a shower. Worse yet, I didn't even brush my hair first. I did manage some jeans and my sporty mommy-on-the-go shoes, but who was looking at that with the rat's nest in the back of my head? I was hoping it was coming off as "touseled" but in reality I think it was more "Mommy needs a shower."

Is it Spring yet?

If I had a hammer

I made an important decision today. It came in a moment of clarity that I've been searching for for years.

The album I will never record would be a folk album.

Here's the bunny trail. I keep listening to that Matt Morris song "Bloodlines." That led me to his performance with Justin Timberlake for the Haiti benefit. They sang Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah," in a version closer to Jeff Buckley's. So then I started listening to some Leonard Cohen. By now I was in iTunes, and it was offering suggestions. So I listened to some Pete Seeger. Some Peter, Paul & Mary. Some Arlo and Pete. A little James Taylor. And then I went back to Peter, Paul & Mary. That's when "Leaving on a Jet Plane" got stuck in my head and my heart. I'd forgotten how much I love that song.

I'm fairly certain only two cassettes worked in our cars while I was growing up. Arlo Guthrie & Pete Seeger's "Precious Friend" and Peter, Paul & Mary's "10 Years Together." That's it. I don't remember that we listened to anything else. Driving in the car? Put in one of those tapes. We sang along. In harmony of course.

Sara Groves said something at her concert in December that totally threw me. Something along the lines of, "I didn't realize that not every family starts singing the moment they get in the car." Huh. Sounds totally normal to me.

Captain America has asked me for years what I would sing if I was really a singer. I haven't been sure. Until today. Because I think my musical heart is folk. I'm not sure if I'm a pseudo-hippie or what. I think part of it is the conviction and passion most folk singers have.

I guess another thing I love about folk music is that it can inspire change in people. You can bring people to your cause or remind people why they believe in it. And I'm such a softy a good folk song can easily bring me to tears.

So on my never-to-be-recorded album I would have the following:
1. Where Have All the Flowers Gone
2. Kisses Sweeter than Wine
3. Leaving on a Jet Plane
4. How Can I Keep from Singing
5. Amazing Grace
6. Lemon Tree
7. Early Morning Rain
8. 500 Miles
9. 75 Septembers
10. Blood and Fire
11. Midnight Train to Georgia

I'm not really sure how those songs would work together, but I guess it doesn't really matter. What with not recording it and all.

What would your album be? Not what you like to listen to most, but what would you want to represent you?

Where have you been?

Or where have I been? In case you're still checking Ye Olde Blog on occasion. Some lowlights and highlights for you:

Lowlights:
• Why are my children so sickly? Natalie had a cold, then Ella got some strange stomach bug, and now Natalie has a cold again. In less than two weeks. And I got sick somewhere in there. (Sub-lowlight: bunkbeds + sick kid on top bunk = not cool)
• Turns out we didn't move THAT far south. It's still very wintry and snowy.

Highlights:
• Sometimes my children are lovely to each other when they're sick. They find each other's favorite toys and things.
• There was melting today!
• My parents came to visit us. It was fun to show them around our new city, and we took advantage of them by making them look at houses with us.
• We bought a house. Closing at the end of March if all goes well.

So the other night Captain America was praying with the girls before bed, and they talked about how they didn't like being sick. "I wish we never had to be sick." So he told them that we'll never be sick when we're in heaven. The rest went something like this:
Ella: "Yes. Someone was sick in heaven."
CA: "No, I don't think so."
Ella: "Yes. It's in my Bible."
CA: "No, I don't think it is."
Ella: "Get my Bible. It's on the shelf."

So that's how it's been here. Plenty of excitement on the horizon, that's for sure. So what have you been up to?

What? Me? Random?

I've just sent the girls into their room for the second attempt at room cleaning. A project they've been working on for two hours. Because they clean for two minutes and start playing. They will, no doubt, take two more hours to clean their room. But you know what? They're staying in there. And I'm cool with that.

We've got some sort of teacher inservice going on here, so Ella had a half day today, Natalie didn't have school at all, and they don't go back til Monday. Natalie and I went to Target this morning to buy her more puzzles since she can't get enough this week. Puzzles, puzzles, puzzles. Puzzle mania. We came home, she made me open them, and then she asked to watch iCarly. She hasn't touched them since.

Did I ever tell you Diet Coke and I made up? We did. I gave up all carbonated beverages for about a month. And then I didn't care anymore. *sip*...ahhhh...

I survived Week 1 of swimming lessons for the girls. I didn't freak out or pass out OR jump in the pool. Success!

I have a deep love for music. Especially songs that are sort of haunting or gut wrenching. I saw Matt Morris on Ellen the other day, and I can't get enough of his song "Bloodline." Click here! The other song I can't get enough of lately is Lykke Li's "Possibility." Click here! You know, if you want. "Maybe There's a Loving God" by Sara Groves is one of the all-time songs of my heart. Click here!

And haunting? Do you know what song is haunting? Have you heard Alison Krauss's "My Ain True Love" with Sting? Oh my sweet haunting perfection. Click here so you can listen to it RIGHT NOW. Speaking of amazing songs from movie soundtracks. "Falling Slowly?" Anyone? Click it.

Alright. That's probably enough youtube action for today. I should check on the room cleaning progress.

Oh the past. How it haunts.

So when I was little I had a boy haircut. My mom worked at a retirement home, and sometimes I'd go visit with her. I can't tell you how many times I heard, "What a cute little boy you have..." I'm really not sure how many times I heard it, but in my mind it's A LOT. I know I should consider the sources, and there may well have been people who would have said the same if I'd had my hair in pigtails. But I never wanted to have short hair again. As in, even as an adult. Every shorter haircut I've gotten I've sat in fear in that chair reciting in my head, "Please don't let me look like a boy..."

I've learned enough as a grownup to know that some people just don't pay attention. I took baby Ella places in head to toe pink, only to hear, "What a cute little boy you have..." Some people just don't look very hard. I rolled with it. Not like she's going to remember it from the baby carrier.

Ella used to have a girlie bob haircut, but it never laid quite right. She has these strange underlying curls. So we went a little shorter (she was thrilled!), and now the curls are free to curl. It's a super cute haircut. I let go of my own issues so she could have it shorter like she wanted.

This week I was taking Ella to school when her tone changed. "Mama? Yesterday we had a substitute teacher, and he thought I was a boy." I asked her what happened. Apparently the teacher was putting the kids in a boy/girl pattern. He put Ella next to a girl. Ella was too shy to say anything (any readers who know Ella will be deeply surprised at the idea of Ella ever being shy, but she is a different kid at school). And then one of the girls in her class told her she should grow her hair longer. "But Mama? I like my hair how it is."

Just rip my heart right out, why don't you? I didn't know where to start. She was embarrassed. I tried to explain that a mistake like that is not hers to be embarrassed about. She's usually so incredibly confident, that I somehow didn't envision dealing with things like this with her. And I certainly don't want to saddle her with my own issues.

Girls are such a challenge to begin with. Friends change on a daily basis. It only gets worse as they get older. I knew that part would be hard. But I somehow didn't expect the reliving of my own issues. And I didn't know how your children have so much of your heart, that their hurts really become your own.

So I tell her she's beautiful. That I love her haircut, and I'm glad she likes it. And I pray. So much. That God will somehow grant me the wisdom to raise these girls to have good self-esteem. That He will help me to keep my own issues and fears out of their lives. That they will know who made them. To know He takes great delight in them. That He knows their joy and their pain.